Mastin Kipp, Guest Author
Not too long ago, I got an e-mail from someone talking about a toxic relationship they were in. She was asking me what I would do if I were in the same situation.
And then… she said this about her partner: “He is making me so negative.”
Now, if you’ve been reading “The Daily Love” for any amount of time – tell me what about this statement is keeping this woman trapped.
Is it him? Is it the circumstance? Is he REALLY making her so negative?
The answer is NO. The only person keeping her down is herself. No one can make her feel ANYTHING without her consent.
So we did some e-mail work and within three e-mail we got her to see that she was the one keeping herself stuck in this negative relationship. We outsource the blame to others many times because we are afraid of change and because it’s SO much easier to blame someone else than to take responsibility for the circumstance and then risk facing the unknown.
But being able to face the unknown is what The Uni-verse is calling you to do on a soul level. Love is what you were born to have, but you will never have it if you don’t love yourself enough to take responsibility for the circumstances in your life and understand that you are continuing to choose your way into them. Even if you are in a situation that was totally outside of your control at first, your choice to stay in that circumstance, in that mindset and in that pattern is up to you.
The choice to change is yours in every moment.
Many times, we are so busy blaming other people that we don’t see that we hold ourselves hostage within this blame. We have been given the incredible power of choice: to choose our life and to co-create it with the Loving Uni-verse that has our back. We have forgotten in those dark moments that everything happens FOR us instead of TO us. We have forgotten that the only things holding us back in life are not our circumstances, but our beliefs about our circumstances. And when we change our beliefs and take constant and persistent action toward them – we change our lives for GOOD!
If you are stuck in blaming other people, make a list of all the things you blame them for. Then turn it around and see that it is you who is keeping yourself hostage with this blame. The idea is not to blame yourself now – no, no, no! The idea is to take your power back by taking responsibility for the circumstance and then asking what you actually want. From there, you can create a new belief system and pattern of action that brings about what you really want.
So, how can you take your power back today? Who have you been blaming and when would NOW be a good time to change?
Copyright © 2013 – Mastin Kipp. Mastin Kipp is the founder of TheDailyLove.com – a website, daily e-mail and twitter account that serves soulful inspiration to a new generation. Started as a feed of quotes sent to Mastin’s friends, The Daily Love shot to fame after a tweet from Kim Kardashian. And a love monster was born. Hosting Mastin on her weekly show Super Soul Sunday, Oprah dubbed him an “up and coming thought leader of the next generation of spiritual thinkers.” Both an honor, and a mouthful. Mastin’s mission is to connect people back to what makes them happy. Happy people make better choices, and better choices make for a better planet.
Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.
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