“If you had a friend or love one who spoke to you in the same way that you sometimes speak to yourself, how long would you allow that person to be your friend or in your life? The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others. You must love who you are or no one else will.” ~ Joshua Miller
“You can’t expect to draw people into your life who are kind, confident, and generous if you’re thinking and acting in cruel, weak, and selfish ways. You must be what it is that you’re seeking – that is, you need to put forth what you want to attract.” – Wayne Dyer
Never allow anything to have a higher priority than looking out for number one. You are all you have. Never allow anyone, not even your partner, to rob you of the single most important personal responsibility of your life. You must take care of you first. Taking care of you first is a lifelong project. It is a lifetime commitment. It must be your top priority, your most specific intention. Don’t take this one lightly.
“Do you love yourself as much as you would want to be loved? Think about this question for a while and be sincere with yourself. The moment you realize that you were looking for love in all the wrong places and the moment you realize that you weren’t even giving yourself the love you were expecting from others, that will be the moment your beliefs about love will change and that will be the moment your life will start to change. In time you will realize that the more love you have for yourself, the more love you will receive from those around you, and what can be more beautiful and fulfilling than living a life that is full of love?” ~ Dana Saviuc
Me first is not selfishness. It is not narcissism. Common sense says, “If I don’t take care of me, who will?” Me first is only what it says. It says, “I care enough about me to make sure that my needs get met and that I will always only depend on myself for myself.”
You must learn to love yourself first. You cannot deliver from an empty wagon. If you do not have love for yourself, how can you give the love that others in your life need?
How you THINK about yourself has everything to do with how you show up in life to others. Want your partner to love you more? Focus on loving yourself. Become more lovable. Demonstrate love. That opens up the possibility and gives them permission to be more like you want them to be.
“Do you want to meet the love of your life? Look in the mirror.” Byron Katie
When I say take care of yourself first, I am not talking about self-centeredness. Self-centeredness breeds indifference to others. The arrogance of only looking out for yourself will find you being passed over in the relationship department.
I am talking about making a contribution to yourself with the same fervor and generosity you would for your partner.
So… Who do you love the most? Your answer should always be, “Me, of course!”
BONUS Article: 5 Things You Can Do To Love Your Authentic Self More
Copyright © 2013 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.
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