You must never forget the importance of the spiritual side of your relationship. Marriage is sacred. So are the vows you make. Making a relationship work should not be totally dependent upon what you or your partner do or do not do. God, a Higher Power – or whatever you choose to call what you believe in – can only inspire you to make the right choices. He alone cannot do it for you. You and your partner must do the work.
Listen for God’s soft whisper. He speaks to you in the stillness of daybreak and in the midst of conflict. Are you listening?
“Crisis is an opportunity for radical change!” ~ Gabrielle Bernstein
During a crisis, incorporating ideas that can be described as spiritual (compassion for self and others, healing from wounds – some of which are older than the relationship – and finding personal meaning in the pain) can ease the process of getting back on your feet and being stronger for the experience.
“It’s important to commit to something higher – whatever you call it/him/her, etc. The element that elevates a spiritual partnership beyond an ordinary relationship is the revolutionary idea that your role is to support each other on your path to reach ultimate evolution, to become your best self. Get clear that what you are looking for is not just physical security or emotional support but spiritual evolution. If your goal is radical evolution of your body, mind and spirit, expect fulfillment beyond your dreams.” Source: http://www.yourtango.com.
Are you spiritually compatible? When I interview a future bride and groom about their wedding ceremony I feel it is important to talk about how much spirituality they want – if any – in their wedding ceremony. Most say that they seldom attend church services, however about 75% prefer to have God mentioned in their ceremony. Occasionally, one or the other will claim to be an atheist. About 50% of atheists will request leaving God in the ceremony, but no scripture – to honor the faith of their guests.
Where both are spiritual, but of different religions, we often will touch on the touchy topic of which spiritual path will you choose for your children, if any. Most have not discussed it. It’s important to incorporate parenthood into your spirituality. Many spiritual practices are rooted in religion, but most would argue that one can be spiritual without being religious. There are countless definitions of spirituality, and how one defines spirituality is unique to his or her experience.
Do daily spiritual exercises such as yoga, walking, reading, reflection (introspection), positive thinking (cognitive work), prayer and meditation.
In my own life, I have come to believe that time spent in prayer and meditation is another way to express my own spirituality. The easiest way to do this is to wake up 15 minutes earlier each morning. Sit in quiet meditation and connect with my inner-self and listen for God’s soft whisper.
If and when you do spiritually connect with someone with whom you are also very compatible, the relationship is taken to a whole new level. It’s that spiritual connection that can really drive the passion. When you connect mind, body and soul, you have all the ingredients for marriage success.
The bottom line is that each and every person is ultimately responsible for his or her own spiritual growth. The more you grow spiritually, the greater presence, peace and harmony you find within. And what you are within reflects in your outer life experiences. I highly recommend the following list of priorities: God, you, your relationship and your work – in that order.
Copyright © 2014 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.
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