Many years ago I went on a special cleansing diet for about 6 days so I could become more sensitized to all aspects of my life. For awhile, I had do give up some of the things that were causing me to feel sluggish, etc. The hardest part was identifying and then breaking free of the belief systems and social programming that I had absorbed over my lifetime in order to reveal my true authentic self. I was overeating and my junk food consumption was at an all time high. It was time to detox my body!
The first 4 days were the hardest. I had headaches from withdrawal from caffeine. However after the 6th day and beyond, I began to make better choices because I felt terrific. I gave up those things that I recognized that were hurting my body, mind and spirit.
Before you try to detoxify your relationships, be sure to take a good look at yourself. Typically, once you detoxify your relationship with yourself, you will be able to evaluate your other relationships with ease.
Every relationship goes through ups and downs, however, if your partner is always putting you down, criticizing and making fun of you in front of your friends, perhaps a relationship detox is in order or the extreme… a fresh start!
Re-examine your relationship! Dump any destructive drama that’s going on in your life. Do you fight, make up, then fight again? Do you feel “not listened to?” You think those kind of people are your friends, but most don’t actually exude any qualities of a true friendship. If you feel stuck, worn down and unsupported or you wonder why your best friend isn’t the person you can count on when you need support, you may be in a toxic relationship.
You deserve someone who will demonstrate their love for you; someone who is honest and trustworthy.
Here are the seven secrets Dr. Brenda Wade, Psychologist and author, has taught to thousands of people. Use them to start ridding yourself of old, toxic habits and begin to replace them with new, healthy patterns.
7 Secrets to Detoxify Your Relationships
1. Respect ~ This is where we begin and end in any healthy relationship. The 7 Secrets actually spell out the word “respect.” This is one of the most important tools I teach. I’m giving it to you here because along with Dr. Oz, I am committed to your health and well-being, and relationships are a cornerstone of both.
2. Extend ~ Become a better person by upgrading your listening and expressing skills. It’s never too late to learn how to make your relationships better.
3. Solid ~ Step on solid ground by remembering the good times you’ve shared and the special qualities you both have. Focus on the solid foundation you’ve built. What we focus on expands and becomes stronger.
5. Expect ~ Use the power of expectation to set clear positive goals in your relationship and expect to reach them. Practice seeing your goal already completed with your inner eye. This exercise pulls you forward toward the goal.
6. Communicate ~ There are three parts to healthy, non-toxic communication. Express feelings as opposed to blaming. Use, “I feel” instead of “You never” or “It’s your fault.” Make a request. Ask for what you would like or need without guilt tripping or manipulating. Listen deeply.
7. Tops ~ Top it off by showing extra acts of acceptance, kindness and loving support.
There is no easy way to detox our relationships. Because it isn’t a matter of neutralizing a toxic person, but disengaging from a toxic bond. Letting go might be another word for it. If you really want to stop them from upsetting you, you need to take charge. Sometimes you know a relationship or friendship isn’t working, but you’ve invested so much time and effort you just keep it going. If the relationship is depleting to you, it might be wise to create boundaries to maintain your sense of self-worth or begin to distance yourself from the one who is.
You have choices and you get to decide what is and what isn’t acceptable treatment from the people in your life. If it’s not okay, do something about it. Don’t wait for them to change first. That isn’t likely to happen.
Larry’s NOTE: The 7 Secrets to Detoxify Your Relationships (above) is copyrighted by Dr. Brenda Wade!
Copyright © 2015 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.
NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.
Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Wedding BLOG” at: http://CelebrateIntimateWeddings.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Networking BLOG” at: http://NetworkingHQ.wordpress.com
Visit Larry’s Relationship Pin Board on Pintrest @ http://www.pinterest.com/larryjames2012/relationships-blog/