Larry James' CelebrateLove.com BLOG

Friday, October 2, 2015

Adrift Into the Scary Unknown

Today, I would like for you to read the following three quotes and spend some time thinking about the standard you have set for your life. Find a time to sit down, and be selfish for a moment every now and then. Often people fail to look at their lives and situations for the soul purpose of trying to find solutions for personal situations. It is important to confront situations head-on and figure out how to improve on them.

Are you on the right track? Where do you stand in the scary unknown?

REL-ScaryUnknown“It is the promise of Love that if we let ourselves go into the unknown, work on ourselves and become the Love we are seeking, that IT will FIND US. Yup, that’s right. But we have to go through the dark night of our fears, dive deep into our insecurities, feel the pain of them and then bring the Light of our awareness to them.” ~ Mastin Kipp, The Daily Love

“Too often people attempt to live cautiously, taking no chances, avoiding all risks… in the safety of established patterns of living. They don’t feel fulfilled… yet they’ve found a niche, a formula… not for success, but mainly to avoid failure. To me, this is the living death. I mean, when security becomes the main goal. We, as humans only grow by taking advantage of opportunities. Life is a risk and we absolutely must reach beyond the safety and familiarity of our previous patterns of behavior in order to find true happiness and fulfillment.” ~ Mack Newton

perfectENDING“By the time the fear subsides, it will be too late. By the time you’re not afraid of what you were planning to start/say/do, someone else will have already done it, it will already be said or it will be irrelevant. The reason you’re afraid is that there’s leverage here, something that might happen. Which is exactly the signal you’re looking for. So fear isn’t just something to deal with and get past. It may mean the moment is nigh – you need to take action now, because it signals that a window of opportunity has opened in front of you.” ~ Susan Biali, M.D.

Fear is the most powerful single factor that deprives you of being able to achieve your full potential. Do your best in everything right now! Don’t ever let your insecurities or past failures or what others might tell you keep you stuck! Focus on what you want and how you can achieve it. If the things you dream for don’t scare you, they probably aren’t big enough.

If you want to give yourself the best gift you could ever receive, believe in yourself. Believe in yourself and never let others try to tell you otherwise or bring you down. You have to be willing to see things you didn’t expect, and figure out what you can tolerate and what you cannot.

Accept that failure is possible and necessary. As Winston Churchill once said, “Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.

Know the consequences of staying where you are. Have faith in your choices. There is never a good reason to slow down. Keep moving forward. Seize the moment!

CLoveLOGOCopyright © 2015 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.

the-archives2Click for Archives! ~ commentSubscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Hey, Guys! What Have You Done for Your Sweetheart Today?

Filed under: For Men Only,Great Advice! — Larry James @ 8:30 am
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Are you a guy who says, “I Love you” by doing small favors for your darling without her having to ask? That’s a good thing. You are on the right track. It’s the little surprises that you do that serves up a reminder that cause her to feel deeply appreciated and loved.

Harry Reis, PhD, professor of psychology at University of Rochester, studied 175 recently wed couples. He found that grand romantic gestures and declarations of everlasting love are not the secrets to marital bliss – it’s the couples who regularly do small tasks for one another who are most likely to be happy.

For married people, these small but frequent gestures serve as ongoing confirmation that our partners still care. “We never really know what’s going on in another person’s mind,” explains Reis. “These gestures show that our partner is thinking of our needs.”

One somewhat surprising finding of Dr. Reis’s not-yet-published research – while women usually are credited with being the relationship experts, it turns out that husbands tend to do these small gestures more often than wives. That might be because while women tend to be very comfortable saying, “I love you,” many men are more comfortable doing small things to show their love.

When it comes to selecting appropriate gestures, Reis says that what matters is that we do things that our partners truly appreciate.

Here are a few ideas that men can do for their partner that will demonstrate appreciation and Love:

mancologne• Offer to babysit the children while your partner either spends some alone time or gets together with her girl friends.

• Handle one of our many chores, preferably unasked; a chore you may not like to do and know that neither does she. She wants to feel emotionally tended to when you take over some of these responsibilities, mundane and otherwise.

• Stand up for her when should the situation arise.

• Fill her car with gas, check the tires, oil, etc.

• Practice good grooming. Dress well. Smell nice.

• Send her an unexpected “love” greeting card for no special reason except that you love her!

• Surprise her with something she mentioned in passing. This is especially a great gift for her to receive because you have to be a good listener for this one. Pay attention to her sizes; make a note and carry it with you.

BedroomFUN• Slow down in bed! Have some fun!

• Be sure to call her when you discover that you might be late.

• Buy you tampons without feeling emasculated.

• Clean up your own messes; avoid porcelain splash in the bathroom; put your own clothes away, shoes under the bed, etc.

• Do all you can to cause her to feel appreciated. Frequently let her know that you appreciate all she does.

• LISTEN to her! Really hear what she is saying. Off goes the TV, radio, put down you smart phone and with eye-contact… genuinely listen! Don’t be a Mr. Fix-it. When she’s had a bad day, just listen. “I understand how you must feel,” etc. If she needs your help she will ask for it, or you could say, “Is there anything I can do to help?”

• Ask yourself, “How much time do I spend with my wife or partner?” Uninterrupted time means time together must be spent without iPhones and Blackberrys — a conversation about anything except work, money or the children. Gifts are nice but material goods do not and cannot compensate for her not being with you.

• Surprise her with a very special “date night!” Spend a minimum of two hours alone. Focus on having FUN together!

• Be reliable. When you say you will do something… do it. And, the sooner the better. Larry’s NOTE: We guys often want to do things at our own speed. That is one of the quickest ways to cause your partner to feel unappreciated.

• Take the time to inquire about the important aspects of her life. Ask questions.

flirt• Flirt! It’s a great way to spark a “romantic” connection.

• Pay attention to her! While it may feel like women might expect guys to remember everything, the more you love her by paying closer attention to her, the more you will learn about her likes and dislikes. The next time you offer her strawberry ice cream and she’s told you a dozen times she doesn’t like strawberry you lose a couple of points and she feels “not paid attention to.”

• NEVER comment on her weight except to say how thin and beautiful she looks. Or… say nothing. Larry’s NOTE: Ladies, PLEASE stop asking, “Does this dress make me look fat?” It’s a trick question that is sure to cause disappointment (or worse)!

• Tell her you love her. Often. Women need to hear the actual words.

Consider this a list to help you get started. Guys, make your own list. Or, women… make more suggestions by posting your ideas in the comments section below.

Larry’s NOTE: A special “Thank you!” to Karen Larson, Editor of Bottom Line Personal for the inspiration for this article!

HeartCoupleCLoveLOGOCopyright © 2013 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
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Sunday, October 21, 2012

What it Takes to Be a Power Couple!

Filed under: Great Advice!,Relationships,Romantic Tips! — Larry James @ 9:00 am
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I said, “power” couple, not powerful couple! There is a difference. Powerful couples would be Melinda and Bill Gates, Superman and Wonder Woman or Hillary and Bill Clinton.

To me a power couple are people who are willing to totally put aside their differences and have a commitment to do “whatever it takes” to make their relationship something they can both be excited to be in. Here are a few ideas – a short list – that you can plug into your relationship to help you move toward being a power couple. Here is what power couples do:

happilyEverAfter• They create a safe place to talk about difficult things.

• They are aware of and respect the “needs” of their partner.

• They consistently do things together that helps revitalize their relationship.

• They look for creative ways to express love to each other.

• In difficult times they take “time outs” to think before they come together again to find mutually agreeable solutions. They bite their tongues rather than say something they will regret later. They resist raising their voices and see no need to be harsh with one another.

• They innovate to be prepared for what comes next.

* They walk hand-in-hand and often kiss in public.

• They keep romance alive by sending love notes and romantic greeting cards for no reason other than they love each other.

• They help each other with household chores and often volunteer to do things for their partner they know their partner doesn’t like to do.

• They make time for a date night at least once each week and take turns planning something romantic.

• Before they take on the morning, they take a few moments to express love, kiss goodbye and wish each other a productive day.

• They practice random acts of romance.

• They study relationships by sharing great relationship books and attend relationship seminars together. They hire a relationship coach when things get sideways.

ANSlove• They make love often, sometimes when one partner would rather not. Their creativity in the bedroom relights the fire each time they come together.

• They muster courage to talk about things that matter that they know might ruffle some feathers and do it in a loving way.

• They fight fair and avoid total blowouts.

• They redefine their relationship to keep it fresh and exciting, knowing that any change can be positive if you find the tools and skills you need. They know that it takes two!

• They talk “nice” to each other and never talk down to each other of call each other names! NEVER!

• They avoid the fatality of inaction and agree to do what needs to be done when it needs to be done.

The real romance exists in making each other better human beings for each other. They also know that there is power in working together in every way. It’s no coincidence that these people find solace in one another. It takes lot of love to be a power couple. You must be committed to each other. You both must have the determination to be together no matter what. You each have to be willing to give up being right and work together with the thought that you are better together as a couple than you would be alone. They each enhance the happiness of the other.

They share a long-term vision of the future, shared dreams, and plans that represent a commitment to one another They are not only great lovers… they are each others best friend!

CLoveLOGOCopyright © 2012 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
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Saturday, July 21, 2012

10 Simple Gifts Women Can Love More than Diamonds

Filed under: Great Advice! — Larry James @ 7:00 am
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Sparkling advice from Marilyn Monroe aside, there are things that some women treasure far more than costly jewels. In many cases, the things she’d love to receive the most from her significant other are simple, thoughtful gifts that show how much you care. These ten unpretentious gifts often sweep women off their feet in a way that diamonds simply can’t compete with:

1. A Love Letter – In today’s electronic age, the handwritten love letter is a dying art. A heartfelt epistle extolling her virtues and declaring your steadfast affection is a surefire way to melt her heart far more than any jewel ever could.

2. Handmade Gifts – Even sloppy or clumsy efforts will almost always be greeted with delight, because a handmade gift requires an investment of time and creative energy. Strolling through a jewelry store and peering into display cases might seem like a tedious effort to you, but she’s certain to be much more charmed by a gift you made solely for her with your own two hands.

3. Something Specifically Tailored to Her – Even the most exquisite and extravagant pieces of jewelry are slightly impersonal. By presenting a gift that speaks exclusively to her and her interests, you can show the lady in your life that you’re listening when she speaks and that you know exactly who she is.

4. A Weekend Getaway – Harried moms will be thrilled at the prospect of a quick, kid-free jaunt. With today’s prices, you can often secure accommodations at a nearby point of interest for the entire weekend for what you’d spend on one pricey trinket, and she’ll treasure the relaxed one-on-one time with you more than any piece of jewelry she can only wear on special occasions.

5. A Scrapbook – Collecting photographs, ticket stubs and other mementos from your lives together and collating them into a scrapbook serves a dual purpose of showing her that you treasure your life spent together and condensing those tiny scraps into one book, where they’re less likely to create clutter or be lost.

6. Her Birthstone – If you’re absolutely determined to give a gift of jewelry, choosing a piece that features your partner’s birthstone is one surefire way to ensure that it has the personal touch that she’ll appreciate.

UndividedAttention7. Honesty – One of the most important gifts you can give a partner is absolute honesty; it’s also a gift that can and should be given every day. The strongest relationships are those built upon a foundation of truth, so avoid the temptation to be less than honest in sticky situations.

8. Your Undivided Attention – The fast pace and demanding nature of professional life today often leaves couples greeting each other largely in passing. Setting aside a special day to devote all of your attention to her is a gift that she’ll treasure for years to come.

9. Something Personal to Your Relationship – A mix CD filled with songs that have special meaning to the two of you, a trip to the place where you first met, or other gifts that reference something specific to the two of you and your relationship are never-fail gifts for any woman.

10. A Sincere Apology – If your gift-giving occasion is the result of a major misstep, a sincere apology will go much farther than a hastily-purchased gift encrusted with jewels. Acknowledging that you’ve done wrong and vowing to make every effort not to repeat it is the most important post-argument gift out there.

Of course, there is one diamond that truly is forever: the one in an engagement ring. If you and your honey have reached this level of commitment, there’s no gift that can compare to the one that symbolizes your love for her and your unwavering faith in your future together.

2heartsCopyright © 2012 – www.BestDatingSites.org. Reprinted with permission.

CLoveLOGOLarry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and a nondenominational minister. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere.

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Wedding BLOG” at: http://CelebrateIntimateWeddings.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Networking BLOG” at: http://NetworkingHQ.wordpress.com
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Thursday, October 6, 2011

Great Advice from the Master of Creativity!

Filed under: Great Advice! — Larry James @ 2:21 pm

SteveJobs

Steve Jobs didn’t just think outside the box, he changed the way we thought about boxes. He was the Master of Creativity! He will be missed. I am proud to be a Mac addict! – Larry James

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