Larry James' BLOG

Tuesday, June 16, 2015

Are You Available for Intimacy?

Intimacy is waaaay more than making Love or having sex! And… in my opinion, more important than making Love or having sex.

REL-IntimacyWhy? Because shared intimacy is the glue that can keep you together even when times are rough and will lead to a much stronger and healthier relationship. These expressions of Love are the single most important acts that keeps couples connected.

Intimacy are expressions of Love and can be expressed in many ways; from opening the door for your partner, sharing your ice cream cone to flirting with a wink.

“Another important point is that if you know you can actually sleep together but not “sleep together,” and still wake up happy, you will have a better shot at your relationship not being based solely on sex – but friendship.” ~ James Michael Sama

“Don’t allow emotional disconnection to last any longer than necessary. When you lose touch with your partner, reestablish it as soon as possible. If you’re staying emotionally disconnected to punish her or him, confess this without delay, regardless of how uncomfortable that may be.” ~ Robert Augustus Masters, PhD

You cannot be emotionally available and experience true intimacy if you are not willing to feel and experience the vulnerability that it brings. Many people are afraid of what they will feel if they truly put themselves out there and feel genuine intimacy and end up being vulnerable. I can promise you this: If you want a more intense and satisfying sexual relationship, allow yourself to be vulnerable and focus more on intimacy for awhile, not sex.

By the way, withholding sex as a way of getting more intimacy – expressions of Love – is never going to work.

“Being an unwilling sexual partner with your spouse. ~ When sexual intimacy is continually withheld from a spouse it can cause serious damage to a marriage. Sexual intimacy is not only a release valve for the pressures of the world; it is the single most important act that keeps couples connected both physically and emotionally. Making this an active part of your marriage can increase the joy and fulfillment of your relationship. There are times when you need to be understanding and patient. Sexual intimacy should never be forced, but rather a tender sharing by husband and wife. Be faithful in making this a joyful part of your marriage.” ~ Gary and Joy Lundberg

IntimacyRecently, a friend sent me the following list of things that he and his partner are committed to doing:

1. Bring home one small, unexpected gift or present.
2. Share some form of physical intimacy.
3. Share an entire afternoon or evening together.
4. Share two insights you gained this week.
5. Write at least one little love note.
6. Mail something to your partner.
7. Plan something special for the upcoming weekend.

BONUS Article: 7 Ways To Enhance The Intimacy In Your Relationship
7 Ways You’re Being Unfaithful to Your Spouse and Don’t Even Know It
Making Love vs. Having Sex!
Intimacy Quiz
Intimacy… It Can Mean Many Things

CLoveLOGOCopyright © 2015 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.

the-archives2Click for Archives! ~ commentSubscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact:, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – and

NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.


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1 Comment »

  1. […] Article: Are You Available for Intimacy? Why Sex is Good for Your Health Intimacy Quiz Celebrate Love at Your Very Own “Wonderama!” […]

    Pingback by It’s Never Too Late to Get Back on Track… S#XUALLY! | Larry James' BLOG — Wednesday, June 24, 2015 @ 7:32 am | Reply

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