David & Darlene Steele, Guest Authors
Commitment is the glue that makes marriage work, and if you want a Radical Marriage, nothing less than Radical Commitment will do. Here are our Five Promises of Radical Commitment to raise the bar and bring your marriage to the next level:
1. I Promise to Love You Every Day ~ I know that love is a choice and I choose to love you always. Though I can get busy and have my moods, you deserve my love and attention each and every day. I choose to love you even when I’m upset or frustrated. I know that loving you means being fully present, telling you my truth, being honest and transparent with my thoughts, feelings, wants, and needs so you know fully who I am. I strive to appreciate and treasure you each day that I’m blessed to have you in my life.
2. I Promise to Choose You First ~ You are the most important person in my life and I commit to not taking you or our relationship for granted, each and every day. Though work, home, finances, family, friends, hobbies, and other stresses and distractions can make this challenging, I choose you first, always.
3. I Promise to Take Responsibility ~ I understand that my outcomes are 100% dependent upon my own choices and actions, and that my thoughts and feelings are my own. I know that our relationship is a mirror reflecting myself back to me, and that my desire to be happy and feel loved by you depends upon my own ability to allow myself to be happy and to receive your love.
4. I Promise to Say “Yes!” ~ You deserve my positive response even when I don’t feel like it. Your needs and wants are a gift to my growth and well-being and the key to a great life together. I am committed to your happiness as much as my own. If I’m unable to grant 100% of your desire or request I will respond positively and work with you to find a creative way to meet your underlying need. You can feel safe with me as one who loves you and will respect and honor your needs, always.
5. I Promise to Be Your Hero ~ When life is challenging (and even when it’s not) you deserve a champion; someone who will be there for you, love and support you unconditionally, no matter what. I commit to being your hero and helping you feel emotionally and physically safe and secure. I believe in you and I believe in us.
Are You Ready for a Radical Marriage?
Does Radical Commitment seem challenging? It is! Radical Commitment is a choice to be there for your partner 100% without holding anything back. These five promises are a stretch. They require effort. They are not easy or automatic. Radical Marriage is about making intentional choices that maximize your fulfillment as a couple and allowing you to live beyond happily ever after.
Larry’s Review: This book, “Radical Marriage” will move you from an ordinary marriage – if you let it – to an incredible relationship that has you living to keep your commitments with one another. Now, that’s radical. Each of you will learn to take total responsibility for your marriage… and experience a radical satisfaction of your partnership that has always been within your grasp, but may have eluded you until you discover and embrace this new way of being with each other. Highly recommended. ~ Larry James. author of “How to Really Love the One You’re With“
Copyright © 2014 David & Darlene Steele. Reprinted with permission. From the book, “Radical Marriage: Your Relationship as Your Greatest Adventure.” David Steele, MA, LMFT, CLC, is founder of Relationship Coaching Institute, the first and largest international relationship coach training organization. David is a pioneer in the field of relationship coaching for singles and couples, author of numerous books, including the ground-breaking book for singles Conscious Dating: Finding the Love of your Life and the Life That You Love.
Darlene Steele, R.N. is Director of Training and Member Support for Relationship Coaching Institute. Darlene draws upon more than 30 years of marital experience and a practical approach to marriage and relationships to bring a unique perspective that complements David’s for a powerful personal and professional team exploring and sharing insights and strategies for creating a Radical Marriage. Together, Darlene and David are examples of ordinary, down to earth people living an extraordinary life through their relationship, passionate about each other and sharing the mission and message of Radical Marriage with other couples who want to “live beyond happily ever after.”
Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.
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