Larry James' BLOG

Saturday, June 22, 2013

How to Get a New Circle of Friends

Filed under: Friendship,Relationships — Larry James @ 8:30 am
Tags: , ,

Paul Sanders, Guest Author

As you have probably learned already, it’s not enough to be optimistic and successful, you also need to be in a success-inspiring environment. The most important element of that environment is the people in your life, and especially friends.

MakeNewFriends4If you’re surrounded with negative, or non-ambitious people, you’ll always have to work twice as hard to keep your success and optimism level.

In this article, I want to share with you the strategy that you can use to create the fun and inspiring circle of friends that you want.

What To Expect From Making New Friends

As you start making new friends, you benefit in three realms: intellectual, emotional, and physical.

In the intellectual realm, great friends give you access to advice, connections, critical thinking, quality feedback, and challenging you to reach explore your potential to make more money and be more successful.

In the emotional realm, great friends give you more motivation; they believe in you and your dreams; they tolerate and understand you; they remind you to be light-hearted and have fun; they cheer you up during life’s darkest moments, and celebrate your highest successes with you.

In the physical realm, with great friends, you go on trips, travels, and adventures together, you enjoy your weekly dose of fun and relaxation, you get to play and be silly like as if you’re a kid again, and discover loads of new places, experiences, and maybe even new hobbies.

With interesting and fun friends, not only can you be yourself, but you also get the support to be your best self!

How Do You Build A Circle Of Friends: A Two-Part Formula

After years of learning and experimenting with various strategies for making friends and building my social life from scratch, I have come up with a simple, yet powerful formula that works. This can work for you if you want to meet new people, and enjoy the benefits of having an empowering circle of friends.

1. Explore The New ~ As I always say, “If you’re not making new friends, you’re making less.” As people move, get in new relationships, change careers, or habits, you start to have less and less people to meet. This is why you absolutely need to be making new friends.

MakeNewFriends3To make it easy to meet new people, you can meet them through an interest group, or a club. To make it easier, join a club that is about something you love. To make it even easier, join the organizing team of that club or interest group, which will make it very easy for you to talk and get to know people.

2. Strengthen The Old ~ In the second part of the formula, you keep up with the people you meet, and introduce them to old friends that you still want to keep in your social circle. If you want to have an entirely new social circle, then introduce these new friends to each other, arrange plans, where you bring them together.

If people stick together because of you, they’ll always be somewhat grateful to you for that introduction. Don’t worry about them being friends and leaving you behind, only the losers do that, and as we said, you’re after great people here.

This is critical because if you bring people together, they’ll start making plans and bringing new people, as well. If you only know people separately, you’ll always have to do all the work of calling, and making plans.

If you adopt this two-part strategy, you’ll soon have more friends than you expected, and start being more selective when choosing friends.

How To Start Making Friends Today

If you’re eager to start building a great social life, filled with the friends you want, then I recommend that you start by doing two things:

First, go to your calendar and put a weekly marker on Tuesday or Wednesday evening. That marker will remind you to take an hour to email, text, or call anyone you want to meet in the coming days or weeks, or anyone new you met recently and want to see again.

Why does this work? Because you don’t have to think about it, you just do it once a week, and never worry about people forgetting about you, just because you forgot to stay in touch.

Second, go look for a club, an interest group, an expat community, or an organization that seems interesting and fun. Subscribe to one or two of those and attend their next events. If you see that the people there are the kind with whom you can enjoy time and learn new things, then you found a winner.

If you find a great expanding community that holds regular social events, then stick with it. That’s where you’ll be meeting new and interesting friends.

Don’t Fail At Making Friends…

When you’re staying in touch and arranging plans with good friends on a weekly basis, and including new ones, you’re really in a position where you literally can’t fail at friendship. You’re also preventing yourself from ever feeling lonely or misunderstood.

paulsandersCopyright © 2013 – Paul Sanders. Paul Sanders teaches you how to overcome shyness and loneliness; learn critical social skills; hold great conversations; make friends and build a social circle. To learn more about Paul, visit


CLoveLOGOLarry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.

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