Larry James' CelebrateLove.com BLOG

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

10 Reasons Not to Text Your Lover

Filed under: Communication,Texting — Larry James @ 7:00 am
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BestDatingSites.org, Guest Author

Texting has become a very popular form of communication. It’s quick and easy. It can be done anywhere and is hardly noticeable to those around you. In spite of all this, texting may not be the best option for some communications, particularly those that are the most intimate. Although keeping in constant contact with your lover via text may be very appealing to you, there are ten good reasons not to text your lover.

1. Errors in sending. We’re human beings and human beings are capable of making mistakes. One of those mistakes can happen when we are sending a text. Our fingers can miss the intended target, without realizing it, and our text can be sent off to someone it was not meant to go to. It could go to one of our parents, our boss, a coworker or a complete stranger. When your text was meant to go to that special someone, it could be quite embarrassing for it to go to someone else instead. It could also create some real confusion if they think it was meant for them.

text-lover2. Electronic record. Your text messages are recorded on your phone and on the phone you send them too. You have some control over whether they are kept stored in your phone or not, but you have no control over their existence once you send them. They can be available for others to see or to be forwarded on for as long as that person should choose to have them there. Some time in the future, you may wish your words weren’t on record.

3. Where are they? You never know where someone is going to be at when they receive your text. At times, a very private text message can arrive when a person is in the midst of serious business. A couple of issues can arise from this. The first is that it can be a big distraction when they are needing to focus on the situation at hand. The second is that they may not be able to respond for awhile, or may forget to respond at all, which can leave you wondering why.

4. Who’s holding their phone? Occasionally someone may hand their cellphone to someone else to use or just to keep for them for awhile. Or they may leave their phone sitting somewhere around the home or at a friends house where anyone could pick it up. Considering this, you really don’t know who is going to be the first to see your text message. It may not be the person you intended it for.

5. Miscommunication. You would think that writing what you want to say would keep your communication very clear, but the opposite is often true. Whether it is text or email, your words can often come across in a way that you never intended and create all kinds of havoc.

6. Subliminal message. For some people, receiving a text message versus saying something in person is perceived as being impersonal. They can see it as a subliminal message that says, “You aren’t important enough to say it out loud.”

7. Don’t be a pest. In your enthusiasm to stay connected to the love of your life, your texting could actually turn into an annoyance. If their phone is continually notifying them of a new text from you, it may end up turning them off instead of endearing you to them. Don’t over do it.

8. Temptation. Texting can be a timesaver or a time waster. Knowing that you can be in constant contact via text can be a real temptation to spend time conversing when you need to be working or studying.

9. Phones can be lost. This relates back to the electronic record item. Your phone or the other person’s phone could be lost and accessed by someone else. Those text messages then become available for the finder to read and possibly respond to. You may think you’re carrying on a conversation with your lover and in reality it is a total stranger. Yikes!

10. When the relationship ends. Love relationships, unless they end in a lifelong marriage, eventually come to an end. Do you want the record of your conversations with that person still residing in their phone for them to laugh over or pass on? Probably not.

So, if you are going to send text to your lover, at the very least, keep it discreet and not overly personal. There are plenty of reasons not to record your intimate conversations on your cellphone.

CLoveLOGOBONUS Article: Can Modern Technology Mess Up Your Relationship?

Copyright © 2011 – www.BestDatingSites.org. Reprinted with permission.

Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and a nondenominational minister. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere.

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

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