Larry’s NOTE: Since about 1982 the soft, soothing sounds of the ocean have been by friend and have lured me to sleep with the help of my trusty CD player. In a former relationship, after a date, my lover and I would kiss goodnight and the last thing I would say to her was, “See you at the beach.” She knew that once I arrived home and my head hit the pillow I would go to my island for an imaginary rendezvous with her. The following poem describes my special island where my lover and I would meet. The link to “At the Beach… Alone Again” at the bottom of this page chronicles the completion of the relationship. ~ Larry James
I go to bed alone and close my eyes.
I hear the sound of the sea crashing against the rocks, then experience the momentary quiet as the ocean waves return to the open sea only to come crashing against the rocks again moments later.
I love the smell of the ocean. And when I sit on the rocks, I love the touch of the waves rolling over me.
I’ve been coming here to my private little island for many years now.
Before you – while waiting for your beautiful brown eyes to find me – I designed a sand castle or two by the seashore, skipped flat stones on the water by the brook in the meadow, and threw driftwood back to the sea.
I thought about someday having you here with me. And I didn’t know who you were.
Once, I scribbled words of desperation on a piece of paper. I stuffed it into a bottle, then threw it into the sea. “Please God, send someone who loves me and someone I can love! Whoever finds this, I love you!”
Then, there you were.
Like some new flower, beautiful and ready to be picked.
And, oh, how I loved you.
“It’s our first night on the beach together. Take a chance on me. Lie down and leave your imprint in the sand, right there, beside mine.”
Two imprints in the sand where there was once only one; far enough from the shore so high tide could not disturb the memory of our being there together.
I can see your beautiful body on pure white sand, laying next to me. This island’s population is but two. This beach belongs only to me and you.
I remember being locked in passionate embrace, counting out the stars together.
A cozy fire of driftwood, from wood we gathered while hunting coconuts, gave us warmth as we fell asleep in each others arms; the sounds of the sea our lullaby.
Best friends and lovers.
From now to forever… together.
Ours is a love that knows no boundaries.
This morning we’ll wade along the shoreline, make love again and count some more stars tonight.
I love to watch you brush the white sand from your cute little behind. I love the sand and I love you.
When we are together we often cling to each other as the sand to your body.
We love to run, holding hands, along the water’s edge. We play. We love and spend time digging clams and just being together.
Occasionally we pause to rest by sitting on a small weather-beaten boat, once turned upside down and now long forgotten by its skipper. Nearby, one solitary oar points westerly, buried partially in the sand.
Knee deep in the water, we knelt, facing each other, as if to pray. Together, our clasped hands reach toward the heavens. Our lips came together as the ocean gently made love to our bronze bodies. The waves are clumsy but they are kind.
As we lie together, the afternoon sun gently kisses our sun-kissed bodies and warms the sand as I count the freckles sprinkled over your beach-brown shoulders.
I love being with you, touching you, kissing your body and watching you enjoy the warmth of the sun.
The distant clouds seem to smile as they watch over the place where we lay.
As leaves blow along the beach, the bleached starfish are washed upon the shore.
I put a seashell to my ear and hear your soft voice whisper, “I love you.”
As the friendly winds gently wake the palms, I show you secret places on our island known only to me. Places, created by God, made only to share with my lover.
Hand in hand, we walk through dense green foliage. We follow a path, only my feet have known, to where a crystal clear stream invites us to bathe together like Adam and Eve on our very own island paradise.
The birds of the island join in joyful chorus to sing songs of peace, love and harmony.
We take pause from our island adventure to savor the meat of a freshly cracked coconut.
We feel the mist from the island’s solitary mountain fall gently upon our skin as we frolic beneath coconut trees near the waterfall in the meadow.
Thanks for the raspberries you picked for me along the way.
Lovers on the beach.
Sleeping on your pillow of driftwood, I lie here, next to you, on our bed of white sand, experiencing our closeness, matching you in sleep breath for breath, yet awake.
Now that you lie sleeping, I’ll take a moment to quietly tell you all the things I never say when you’re awake.
Deep within slumber, you manage a smile. I know you hear me. I love you.
I let you sleep because I love to watch you all disheveled and unwound, dressed up in your undress.
Lying close, in your shadow, I fall asleep.
We sleep well together.
I have often been alone on the beach to spend quiet moments with my thoughts about what it would be like to be with you forever.
I love to be with those thoughts because I love you and I want to be with you wherever you are.
That I only love you, is not enough. I love you unconditionally!
I cherish the thought of a forever love relationship with you!
We’ve been so long at the beach we taste like the sun.
We walk in the sea breeze to the water’s edge for a quick splash of cool ocean.
The beads of water on your beautiful body glisten as we walk to our favorite spot on the beach for making love.
Some would say the sun is much too hot today for love. It matters not to us.
Your eyes tell me you want me.
You only have to look at me, that’s all.
Your body says, “Come closer, my love.”
You wear nothing but a lavender orchid in your hair; my island angel in the sun.
We touch and I feel your body sizzle from the heat of our passion.
Your skin is soft as angel’s breath.
I brush gently against your breasts and we tingle as we touch. The fire inside visibly expresses; soft lips to soft lips; thigh to thigh. How perfectly we fit together.
My hands trace new and exciting memories all over your body.
Our hot bodies communicate only words of love; so softly; words only our heart can hear and understand.
And your eyes, set on fire by desire, were made to dance by whispered sighs of love and the passion of the moment.
I quietly speak your name. “Oh, God, I love you.”
The sound fades into the wind as we become lost together, somewhere out there; our brief escape to where only total trust and pure love are present.
We smell like love.
How far away this world becomes in the harbor of each other’s arms.
I want to forever be with you.
Friendly seagulls wink as if to nod their approval as we come together in the sand.
In the afterglow, we hold each other, oh, so closely.
We watch as the dolphins gracefully dance with the water. We know they know.
Suddenly an ocean breeze begins to stir, cooling our bodies – anticipating our need for it – following our passion on the sand.
Afternoon shadows gather as the sun prepares to go to sleep.
Our love has a magical quality. Who knows, in the quietness of our love, we may even see the wind together.
Now, I stand watching as you walk down the beach. Oh God, will this be the last time? I don’t want to be alone again.
What will happen if I am not to again know your warm arms, your soft, suntanned shoulder next to my face in the late afternoon sun, your lips against mine?
I try hard to memorize you, knowing it may later be important. I remember the way you walked and the way you looked back over your shoulder at me.
Were we imaginary lovers only?
Was this the sound of farewell I hear screaming silently in my ears?
Do you think I’d dare to leave you walking lonesome on the beach into someone else’s summer?
I still long to see you one more time coming down the beach.
I wonder if the time will ever pass till we’re together even for a while again.
I’m sorry no one was there to see how happy we were together.
The clouds were sad today.
No dolphins came to play.
The seagulls lament.
I remember how I cried when my first snowman melted. The snow, it kept falling, worthless, like the tears you cry over lost love.
How can we be sure of anything? The tide changes. Has it changed that much for us?
I’m not sure what all this means. Will the good times suddenly be forgotten? Nay! I will not sleep without your memory.
I wonder why I cannot shake our true love from my mind.
It may be that we built our love only on memories and make them more than what they were. It must be or wouldn’t you still be here? I dare not say for I do not know.
I pray God allows the memories not to fade.
And lovers? They sometimes go away.
That time of loving may not come again, so I’ll just add the precious times we had together to my collection of warm and wonderful memories.
Perhaps if the love we share could be unconditional, and maybe if we never allowed the presence of past hurts to affect the love and devotion we feel for each other today; or. . . what if by daily reaffirming our commitment to speak only words of love, acceptance, understanding and forgiveness we could learn to love unconditionally? Are there some answers we can ponder?
When all of the old memories I call back to help me sleep don’t work, maybe I’ll try thinking about pop tarts and dixie cups half filled with luke-warm coffee.
Or maybe, in my mind, I’ll return to the beach, to again be with you.
I can, at will, if I choose, always create in my imagination my lovely paradise with you.
I will take no other lover to our beach. Only you.
When I think of love and loving, I’ll remember you.
For myself, I’ve kept your smile.
If I tried, and I will not try, I could blot out all but your beautiful brown eyes. Your eyes always told the truth about the depth of love you felt for me. Your eyes never lie. Not even now.
Because I have memories, I will never be alone.
I guess I’ll spend some time letting myself come first for a while. And when I tumble into sleep yours will be the last face I will see.
In loving you I’ve held back no reserve and so I’ve nothing left to give tomorrow’s lover when you go.
See you at the beach!
Larry’s NOTE: Want more? Although the beach described in the poem above is imaginary… the relationship and the pain of a changing relationship was very real. Each night as I went to sleep, I listened to the sounds of the ocean on my CD player as I imagined being on the beach with my lover.
When I knew the relationship was complete, I began keeping a daily journal. Notice that I did not say that the relationship was over. Relationships never end. You can be complete with a relationship but they never end. Death, divorce, or separation does not end a relationship, it only changes it. As long as you have memory, you will have relationships. Letting go and moving on is the difficult part. Writing the poem (below) was a necessary step to facilitate the healing process and to bring closure to the relationship. ~ Larry James
BONUS Article: At the Beach… Alone Again
For YOUR Eyes Only
Maturity in Relationships
Copyright © 2015 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.
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