Quiet please! In some relationships… it’s a noisy world.
Sometimes it is best to just listen. Don’t talk.
Few things are more frustrating in a relationship than having to repeat yourself because the person you are speaking to isn’t listening or both parties are so determined to get their own points across that they have little regard for what the other is saying. We all like to broadcast their thoughts and feelings, however not at the same time.
Listening and making constant adjustments is not just a short term quality solution. It creates a feedback loop between both partners and allows for both to be heard. Like I said before, sometimes it is best to just listen. Stop what you are doing; no texting, turn off the TV, and stop working on your computer. Make eye contact to show you are interested. Don’t interrupt. Especially if there is disagreement present.
No multi-tasking is allowed while listening. If only we’d listen and stop thinking about what we’re going to say next, we could pick up crucial hints about what our partner is communicating. Let your partner talk until they have said all they need to say, then acknowledge that you heard them and then shut up. Save your comments for another time.
Effective communication is the most vital component in having a healthy love relationship. Communication occurs when one person talks and the other listens. The “effective” part of communication is one that includes clarity in expression and the mutual exchange of thoughts and feelings.
When couples don’t listen to one another, the result is often frustration, anger, misunderstandings, and hurt. Listening means hearing what is said in terms of understanding, giving the information room in your head, and listening with an open mind to let the information be well-received.
Listening to your partner opens the door to trust and communication on a much higher level. Giving your partner their due respect when they are trying to communicate with you only increases the power of the relationship, increasing the chances for a life of happiness and joy.
Listening is a gift you give to your partner. Give it freely without conditions. Listen with affection to your partner; be in their shoes when they speak; listen with patience; listen without arguing, or changing the subject. Listening is an inspired solution to a happy and healthy relationship. Listening is an art.
Shh! Quiet please.
BONUS Articles: Do You Have Audioapathy?
No More “Mr. Fix-it!” – For Men Only
Copyright © 2012 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.
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Be generous with your words of love! Words describe your feelings. Love needs to be communicated. Make sure that the words you speak come straight from your heart. Relationships move forward faster as love is shown, not just spoken in words. Saying “I love you” and other words of affection often reinforce your commitment and devotion.
• “Tonight you can have the TV remote!” 
Relationship disagreements are disruptive to say the least. They make us sad, resentful, upset, angry and more. 
It is a wise love partner who is aware of the potential damage loose words can cause. Words spoken in anger inflict wounds that sometimes take a long time to heal. Think first, then speak.
Trapped energy causes you to cling to misconceptions about your relationship. The process of openly and honestly communicating will help you convert painful emotional energy into powerful energy you can use to move your relationship forward. Once the precious energy that was trapped as a painful experience becomes free, it can then be expressed as forgiveness, goodness, beauty and love. 
Copyright © 2009 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “
Hearing is involuntary. You can be sound asleep and still hear something or someone, but listening is voluntary. It is an intellectual and emotional choice. It implies effective communication between the sender and the receiver, which hearing does not.
Hearing is involuntary. You can be sound asleep and still hear something or someone, but listening is voluntary. It is an intellectual and emotional choice. It implies effective communication between the sender and the receiver, which hearing does not.
It may take courage for your partner to express their feelings if they haven’t been used to doing so. To immediately defend your own position (or to disagree or argue) invalidates your partner’s feelings and usually serves to turn off future sharing possibilities. Listen for the opportunity to assist the relationship by taking responsibility for what you may be doing that trips their trigger and causes them to make a choice to feel the way they do.
