I would be the first to say that technology is terrific! However it has its pros and cons. If you are not careful it can create distance between committed couples. That being said, there are times when you can appreciate life and your spouse more without the use of technology. Our challenge to you? Spend a day unplugged “with” the one you love.
Turn off your phone(s) – Cell phone and land line (if you still have one). While your phone can keep you connected across the miles, it can also constantly distract you from the moment you’re living in. Make a pact to turn off your phones on Friday evening and don’t look at them again until Sunday morning. You’ll be amazed at how much more time you have with your sweetheart and how much more you will actually listen to what they have to say when you’re not being interrupted by various calls and texts.
Turn your computer off for the weekend. Don’t even check your e-mail. Stay off Facebook and Twitter. (Bet you’ll suffer withdrawal!)
I know. It’s hard… but you can do it.
Leave the iPod and iPad at home – We all love music and entertainment, but spending time solely focused on each other can do nothing but boost your relationship. Plan a picnic under a tree in the park. You can take a walk and listen to each other and the sounds of nature around you. The result? You will feel more connected to each other and more at peace in your world.
Lose the TV remote – Picture this: sitting on the couch with your sweetie and not watching television. Without the distraction of reality television or ESPN you can spend time together the old fashioned way… talking, playing a game or planning something fun to do over the weekend. Often couples who have conflicting work schedules find it difficult to schedule time to be together. You may find out that your partner is a lot more interesting than the re-run you would’ve watched and that you share one more thing in common (like being terrible at Scrabble). Put your DVR to good use. Watch your favorite show at a later day.
I had a coaching session with a couple recently who decided to spend the weekend working together to do the chores around the house that that both had been putting off for months, but to do them together. They then rewarded themselves with a fabulous meal at their favorite restaurant and a night out on the town. The following weekend they enjoyed some great music together at a music festival with their friends.
I guess the point is, if you really love each other, I’m thinking that it’s a great idea to make some special plans to spend some “quality” time with each other. “Who’s got time for that?” you say. You must “make time” to do fun things together. It keeps things interesting. Whatever it is that makes you and your partner happy, stop putting it off, and make plans to do it this week. Never let electronics get in your way of being together. Take the unplugged challenge and you may discover what you’ve been missing.
Larry’s Note: A special “Thank you” to the great people at MissNowMrs.com for their contribution to this article.
BONUS Article: Put the “Fun” in Relationship Fundamentals!
Copyright © 2012 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.
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It is at times like these, when tempers are flaring, that words can not only fan the flames, they can be like a flash fire; once the fire rages through, there is not much of anything left.
So. . . take a DEEP breath, (inhale in through your nose and exhale through your mouth). Go ahead. Breathe. Now here’s what matter’s most.
• Make Some New Promises to Your Partner – Making a promise is easy! Making sure you have the
Love, kindness, respect, devotion, change, gratitude, listening, mindfulness, affection, interaction, boundaries, integrity, trust, support, encouragement, shared responsibility, sexual intimacy, laugh together, accountability, effective communication, friendship, a sense of humor, a shared vision of your relationship, shared decision making, etc. These are great relationship builders. They draw you closer to each other.
Be spontaneous. Lighten up and have some fun. Loosen up. Be funny and flirty. Smile! Humor and laughter are amazing tools. They can turn any serious situation into something to laugh about. They can lighten the mood just about anywhere. Look at your relationship with fresh eyes. Be each others best friend.




