Larry James' CelebrateLove.com BLOG

Saturday, May 26, 2012

Get Unplugged!

Filed under: Have FUN Together,Lighten Up — Larry James @ 8:00 am

I would be the first to say that technology is terrific! However it has its pros and cons. If you are not careful it can create distance between committed couples. That being said, there are times when you can appreciate life and your spouse more without the use of technology. Our challenge to you? Spend a day unplugged “with” the one you love.

cellOFFTurn off your phone(s) – Cell phone and land line (if you still have one). While your phone can keep you connected across the miles, it can also constantly distract you from the moment you’re living in. Make a pact to turn off your phones on Friday evening and don’t look at them again until Sunday morning. You’ll be amazed at how much more time you have with your sweetheart and how much more you will actually listen to what they have to say when you’re not being interrupted by various calls and texts.

Turn your computer off for the weekend. Don’t even check your e-mail. Stay off Facebook and Twitter. (Bet you’ll suffer withdrawal!) ;-) I know. It’s hard… but you can do it.

Leave the iPod and iPad at home – We all love music and entertainment, but spending time solely focused on each other can do nothing but boost your relationship. Plan a picnic under a tree in the park. You can take a walk and listen to each other and the sounds of nature around you. The result? You will feel more connected to each other and more at peace in your world.

beachfunLose the TV remote – Picture this: sitting on the couch with your sweetie and not watching television. Without the distraction of reality television or ESPN you can spend time together the old fashioned way… talking, playing a game or planning something fun to do over the weekend. Often couples who have conflicting work schedules find it difficult to schedule time to be together. You may find out that your partner is a lot more interesting than the re-run you would’ve watched and that you share one more thing in common (like being terrible at Scrabble). Put your DVR to good use. Watch your favorite show at a later day.

I had a coaching session with a couple recently who decided to spend the weekend working together to do the chores around the house that that both had been putting off for months, but to do them together. They then rewarded themselves with a fabulous meal at their favorite restaurant and a night out on the town. The following weekend they enjoyed some great music together at a music festival with their friends.

I guess the point is, if you really love each other, I’m thinking that it’s a great idea to make some special plans to spend some “quality” time with each other. “Who’s got time for that?” you say. You must “make time” to do fun things together. It keeps things interesting. Whatever it is that makes you and your partner happy, stop putting it off, and make plans to do it this week. Never let electronics get in your way of being together. Take the unplugged challenge and you may discover what you’ve been missing.

Larry’s Note: A special “Thank you” to the great people at MissNowMrs.com for their contribution to this article.

BONUS Article: Put the “Fun” in Relationship Fundamentals!

CLoveLOGOCopyright © 2012 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
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Follow Larry’s “Wedding BLOG” at: http://CelebrateIntimateWeddings.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Networking BLOG” at: http://NetworkingHQ.wordpress.com

Saturday, December 10, 2011

I’m Upset… AND I Need a HUG!

Filed under: Anger Issues,Hugs,Lighten Up — Larry James @ 9:00 am

When in the heat of the battle, always remember: a warm hug cools a slow burn. It may be better to temporarily put aside feelings of anger during misunderstandings and express your love in a silent, close embrace.

It is at times like these, when tempers are flaring, that words can not only fan the flames, they can be like a flash fire; once the fire rages through, there is not much of anything left.

A hug at that moment, would be a shining example of unconditional love. Being angry doesn’t mean you are no longer loved or lovable, or that you do not love your love partner.

Love stands on its own. It only needs your constant attention if you want it to grow. While it may be difficult to express love in the middle of no agreement, it is possible.

Imagine a relationship where love partners, in the midst of a disagreement, can agree to a truce long enough to again call attention to the single thing that keeps them together. . . Love!

Hold one another, if only for a moment. When things cool down, have a warm and loving conversation that again gives birth to the possibility of agreement.

If you can imagine it, you can bring it to pass. What an exciting possibility! Love more quickly heals a slow burn.

HugsGlittersCLoveLOGOCopyright © 2011 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
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Follow Larry’s “Networking BLOG” at: http://NetworkingHQ.wordpress.com

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Take a DEEP Breath!

Filed under: Breathe,Lighten Up,Relationships,Romantic Tips! — Larry James @ 9:00 am

Let’s face it. Life can get hectic. So can some relationships. If feels like there are never enough hours in the day to check off every item on your to-do lists or to spend quality time with each other. In this fast-paced world, sometimes what we need most is a way to slow down a little bit. Fortunately, I’ve got some tips to help you do just that.

breathe1So. . . take a DEEP breath, (inhale in through your nose and exhale through your mouth). Go ahead. Breathe. Now here’s what matter’s most.

Try Something New – Listen to a new song, try a new recipe, read a new book (use your imagination!). There are so many ways to relax and focus your mind without leaving home.

Embrace the Experience – Even when completing an everyday task, try to immerse yourself in it, don’t just race through it. Let it be an end in itself.

Remember to Breath – If your day starts to slip away from you or you start to feel overwhelmed. . . STOP! Take a few deep breaths to clear your head. If you follow the way I talked about breathing when you started reading this article, it will have a calming effect. Trust me… it works!

Use All Your Senses – Even when you are doing something as simple as brushing your teeth each morning, you can enjoy a refreshing and calming experience. You will want to have a fresh mouth for your good morning kiss!

Do or Say Something Nice to Your Partner Every Day! – Think only positive thoughts about each other. Give up being “right” about YOUR position. Being a couple is an awesome responsibility. Don’t talk about the past – focus your energy on the future. Do things that cause you both to “choose” to be happy. Be more “romantic” with each other. Demonstrate your love for each other. Speak only kind words to each other.

whisperMake Some New Promises to Your Partner – Making a promise is easy! Making sure you have the
incentive to stick with it is even better. What is your incentive? If your new promises to each other drive you, if you act in accordance with that drive as you move forward, you will tend to stay on track. The only reason to fail to make good on your new promises is to give less than your best effort.

Take Another DEEP Breath! – Fill your lungs with fresh air. Go ahead. . . do it again!

Whisper Words of Love – OR… surprise you partner by sending a “romantic” greeting card for no reason other than you want to say how much you care. Or… write your own “romantic” message. Sprinkle a few of these notes around the house (on the bathroom mirror or on their pillow, etc.), in the car, or wherever you partner may happen to look.

Larry’s Note: This article was inspired by an ad in “O” Magazine. Crest Complete toothpaste can help you smile with confidence! Yes… I’m a guy and I read “O” Magazine! ;-)

CLoveLOGOCopyright © 2011 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Wedding BLOG” at: http://CelebrateIntimateWeddings.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Networking BLOG” at: http://NetworkingHQ.wordpress.com

Friday, October 7, 2011

Put the “Fun” in Relationship Fundamentals!

Filed under: Having FUN,Lighten Up — Larry James @ 8:00 am

Most everyone knows the fundamentals of successful relationships. Yet sometimes we forget the most basic “to dos.” A healthy love relationship must be based on the belief that both partners are equal, that the power and control in the relationship are equally shared. Some of the characteristics of a healthy relationship include:

CoupleLove, kindness, respect, devotion, change, gratitude, listening, mindfulness, affection, interaction, boundaries, integrity, trust, support, encouragement, shared responsibility, sexual intimacy, laugh together, accountability, effective communication, friendship, a sense of humor, a shared vision of your relationship, shared decision making, etc. These are great relationship builders. They draw you closer to each other.

As you focus on getting better together. . . remember not to be so serious. Ease up a bit. Relax, take a deep breath and be silly with one another. Gave a giggle or two. Life is too short to be serious.

Happy couple embracing and laughingBe spontaneous. Lighten up and have some fun. Loosen up. Be funny and flirty. Smile! Humor and laughter are amazing tools. They can turn any serious situation into something to laugh about. They can lighten the mood just about anywhere. Look at your relationship with fresh eyes. Be each others best friend.

The simple response of laughing will increase your well-being, decrease stress, and can actually increase your natural life. A lighter mood is often a better space to work in because now your body and mind isn’t filled to the brim with negative emotions. When you are more light-hearted and relaxed then the solution to a situation is often easier to both come up with and implement. Have a look at “Let There Be Light” for more on this topic.

“No relationship is perfect, ever. There are always some ways you have to bend, to compromise, to give something up in order to gain something greater…The love we have for each other is bigger than these small differences. And that’s the key. It’s like a big pie chart, and the love in a relationship has to be the biggest piece. Love can make up for a lot.” ~ Sarah Dessen, This Lullaby

Embrace love! Follow some of these ideas and you will be amazed how the dynamic of your relationship will change for the better. Being happy and having fun in a relationship can take some work, but if you’re in it for the long haul, the results are well worth it.

BFFCLoveLOGOCopyright © 2011 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

letsbefriends2

Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Wedding BLOG” at: http://CelebrateIntimateWeddings.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Networking BLOG” at: http://NetworkingHQ.wordpress.com

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Let There Be Light

Filed under: Lighten Up,Relationships — Larry James @ 3:37 am
Tags: , , , , ,

Don’t take life or yourself so seriously. Lighten up!

There will be screw-ups and breakdowns. Roll with the punches.

Leave work at work. Don’t bring it home. Surprise yourself with a massage on the way home.

Whistle a happy tune. Learn a really funny joke and tell it to at least 10 people in one day. Be brave. Tell a joke to someone you don’t know in an elevator. (I did that once and booked a speaking engagement as a result).

If you make a mistake, don’t let it get you down. Acknowledge the mistake, take corrective action and continue moving forward.

Stop being so rules focused. It’s okay to break a few rules now and then on your way to being in a happy state. Do something together that tickles your funny bone. Kiss yourself in the mirror.

Poke fun at yourself, but never at your partner. That’s their job. Are you taking life too seriously all the time? Don’t. Be frivolous. Surround yourself with people that make you feel comfortable just being yourself.

When was the last time you laughed? I mean. . . a real belly-laugh! Stop that serious pose and let some of the laugh lines win for a change. Go to a local comedy club. Let your hair down. Why humor? Reduce stress through positive emotions and laughter. Why not?

Smile often. Research has shown that the mere physical act of smiling, without actually feeling like it, triggers internal biological reactions that stimulate emotions and contribute to a better mood – in you and others.

Lighten up, people!

Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused.

smileyheart

Copyright © 2010 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and a nondenominational minister. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere.

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

Add Larry James to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Wedding BLOG” at: http://CelebrateIntimateWeddings.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Networking BLOG” at: http://NetworkingHQ.wordpress.com

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