How long has it been since the two of you really spent some “quality” time together? Does your relationship need a little extra oomph? Whether you’ve been married or together for years, show your partner how much you appreciate them by planning some sexy surprises for a very special night together. I’m talking about a night with absolutely no distractions; no kids, no smart phones, iPads, texting, TV, etc. None! I’m talking a very special evening of Love and romance. The kind of time where you both really let your hair down and genuinely BE together; where you can cuddle, caress and celebrate your Love together in special ways.
Alone time with your partner can sometimes be challenging and hard to arrange because of long hours at work and kids. You have to plan time – or rather “make” time like this to get together. Don’t rush. Take your time planning. Why not make these precious hours you two share extra exciting? Plan a “Wonderama” where you will rediscover the wonder of each other. It’s time for a little hedonistic fun. The pursuit of pleasure is something that many couples let slide when they have been together for a long time.
“My job is to be helpful!” …To assist you with some ideas that will help you express the love that was strong in the beginning, is still there, and if you’re both on the same page… will manifest itself again in a very special way.
You have to work together to make something like this to work. Creating your “Wonderama” takes some preplanning and may stretch your creative abilities. It’s a romantic break from routine. Decorate a special place. Turn it into your own sensual play space or love nest. It could be a mattress in the living room floor (or move the coffee table off to the side so you have room to lay down layers of soft blankets) or the back yard (pull out your blow-up mattress and sleeping bags), the bedroom, (I prefer the bedroom, but that’s just me), or a hotel room for one night. You can’t get sexier than sharing strawberries (the chocolate-dipped ones – they’re an aphrodisiac) and champagne in bed. Make it up for you. Design the layout together. Forget your age. Never let age be your cage. Consider a blanket-fort with lots of soft pillows. That is childlike but fun. Focus on Love and romance.
Once you set a time and a date, tease your partner with little notes several days in advance that remind them of your special night together. Leave a single strawberry and a note that reads “See you tonight,” or a Post-It® note on the bathroom mirror. Send each other tantalizing text messages during the day of. Something simple and sexy will do. The anticipation will make an ordinary night much more alluring. Think seduction. Get a little edgier by having a blindfold and/or handcuffs which you may or may not use.
You can do this by yourselves or hire some helpers to help you brainstorm some super romantic ideas. Remember that being romantic is all in the attitude that you bring to this special night. Pamper yourselves. Rent a Masseuse for the evening. Two works nice – one for each of you. Treat yourselves to a sensual twin massage. Before you begin, choose some soothing music to play in the background. The relaxing pressure of the massage helps put you back in touch with your bodies: the ultimate preparation for your late-night “Wonderama!” There’s nothing more romantic and relaxing than a massage. (Tip: My favorite… Coconut-passion-fruit massage oil).
Relax. One couple I know hired a harpist to play their favorite romantic music for a couple of hours in the room next to them while they played together. Surely by now you both have a favorite song or two. Play them and burn a CD with more of your favorite tunes. Dance a verrrry slow, sexy dance.
You could hire a caterer to bring in snacks to nibble on when you get tired of nibbling on each other. Feed each other hazelnut truffles or cinnamon-flavored ganache. Chill your favorite beverages. Put a lot of thought into this creative endeavor. Cook up one special surprise for your partner. Write 4 or 5 romantic things to read to your partner when the time is right. Don’t hold back. Say what’s in your heart. A little mystery can go a long way. This will be a night to remember.
A “Wonderama” is a very special time to be together and the purpose is to create a cozy retreat chucked full of Love and romance. It will rekindle the romance that may be missing. The intent is to spice up your love life. Do plenty of touching and flirting. You may rediscover what it’s like to really be in Love and both agree to make it an annual (or quarterly) romantic adventure. Sprinkle some rose petals around the room or some of your most loved fresh flowers.
Temporarily dismiss the cares of the day, any relationship issues and anything else that could distract you from really being together. Share a warm shower with a loofah sponge. Good hygiene is paramount. Who cares if you can only fit one person in there? Or take a bubble bath together with lots of bubbles and subtle scents. Lavender oil has a fresh, sweet, floral, herbaceous aroma that is soothing and refreshing. This night should not be without it. Don’t forget the rubber ducky. Lather each other up with some vanilla bath gel and you won’t mind being in such close quarters. Towel each other off.
Light some scented candles or incense. Time for lights out. I like the subtle aroma of beeswax candles which is totally natural and not overpowering like some scented candles. Be playful. Experiment with seductive touch. Bring toys. Use them. Feed each other grapes along with your special beverage. Shed your inhibitions. Let yourself go. Demonstrate genuine interest in each other. Blindfold your partner. Make sure they can’t peek! Then, feed them a piece of food and have them describe what kinds of flavours, textures and memories they are experiencing. Some good old-fashioned necking might be in order too. Be brave. Hold no Love back. Demonstrate your love. Let Love express itself in ways you have nearly forgotten. Dress (or undress) for the occasion.
Lie in each others arms. Kiss. Relax with one another. Share your best memories of when you first met. Do spoons. Have FUN together. “More grapes, please!” See if you can be present and go away with each other at the same time. Keep going. Tell each other something they don’t know about you. Hold each other. Whisper sweet somethings! Express your deepest feelings with words that you whisper aloud. Relax together… together. Really BE together. If your partner is willing (and ONLY if they are willing)… act out a fantasy (within healthy limits, of course). Let your guard down. If there’s something that your partner has been wanting to do, be willing to give it a try; you could surprise yourself and love it. Talking about intimacy can be physiologically arousing to both partners.
Say I love you now and then… out loud! Love should never be hushed or rushed. Kiss some more – a long lasting kiss this time. Have quiet, intimate conversation. Return to the beginning. Recreate the excitement of your first encounter. Talking about business and the kids are off limits. Sharing humor and laughing together will help you feel closer and wull remind you how much you care about your partner. Take a few photos to preserve the memories you are making. You are going to wonder why you didn’t come up with this idea yourself.
If you think your adventures between the sheets needs a wake-up call, creating a “Wonderama” should do the trick. It’s a passionate, intimate, emotional outlet and a way to become closer to your partner. By the way… you decide… sex doesn’t have to be the happy ending to this delicious night together. You want your partner to be focusing specifically on you and looking forward to your next rendezvous together. Don’t follow a script or try to guess how this might end up. Discard your expectations and just let whatever happens happen. Let Love lead the way. Enjoy each other like you did when you first met. It’s important to keep the intimate part of your relationship at the top of your romantic bucket list.
If the spirit (or whatever) moves you, you have my permission to go “all the way!” (wink, wink)
Time now to rest and fall asleep in each other’s arms. Now… wasn’t that fun?
Have breakfast in bed!
BONUS Articles: It’s Time to Get Serious About Sex! ~ Video
How a Trip to the Grocery Store Can Feed Your Sex Life – (Guys! Pay Attention!)
Know What Turns You On
Discover Your Partner’s Hot Buttons!
Touch for Two
Copyright © 2013 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” Larry James is a professional speaker, author, relationship coach and an award winning nondenominational Wedding Officiant. He performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere. Something NEW about relationships is posted every 4th day on this Relationships BLOG.
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